Gripe No. 67: Bag-induced back sweat in disc golf

Carts don’t belong in disc golf.

This is a personal belief of mine.

And based on reader reactions, it’s one of my more controversial opinions. On my end, nothing’s changed. Disc golf is a sport. As such, some kind of effort, however pathetic it might be, should be required. You can’t use golf carts on the PGA Tour. With the DGPT following closely in its footsteps, I’d like to see something similar. Casual play or competitive play: In my mind …

It doesn’t matter.

Carts belong in grocery store parking lots – not public parks. However, come summertime, I’ve got to hand it to the cart crowd: You guys aren’t dealing with back sweat – or much of it, at least.

I envy you.

Utah is a desert. Ours is a dry heat.

And yet, come July and August, five holes into a round of disc golf, it’s Niagara Falls down my backside, thanks to the tag-team duo of the sun and my Upper Park Shift. And again – it’s Utah.

I can’t even imagine hucking plastic in Florida, Georgia or Alabama this time of year where the sticky, humidity-packed air is Mother Nature’s version of back sweat. Without fail, regardless of location, what takes five (or fewer) holes to transpire annoyingly lasts for the rest of the round.

Whether it be a plain, old t-shirt or that fancy-schmancy Dri-FIT stuff from Nike, with every pull of a disc, you’re reminded that you’ve got a second (smelly) skin heck-bent on following the contours of your body through each and every movement – this isn’t great for disc golf.

The bugs are a bonus, of course.

I’m no entomologist …

But here are a few things they like:

• Old trash.
• Overripe fruit.
• Outdoor lighting.

Also, standing water.

Like the sixth Great Lake that forms on your back (and bum) during Summer golf. 

And when you finally do grow accustomed to it, the second that AC hits when back in the car, you’re reaching for your North Face in the backseat. Only, it’s not there, because it’s hot …

Remember?

Apart from abstaining from summer disc golf, considering the fact that cart-use is the best defense against the dark art that is back sweat, there are no winners in this scenario – only losers.

Stinky losers.

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Editor’s Suggestions:

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