I’m big on words.
That goes for this blog.
But it goes for the course, too.
You might not be a writer or the second-coming of Charles Dickens, but when you throw a quality shot, don’t be afraid to have some fun with the words you use to express yourself.
Here are five ways to do just that …
1. ‘Kobe’
If ever there was a sport that knows clutch moments, it’d be basketball. And if ever there was a basketball player who knew a thing or two about rising to the occasion, it was (tears) Kobe Bean Bryant. I’m not one of those nutcases who goes as far as claiming Kobe’s career was better than those of Michael Jordan or LeBron James, but let’s not kid ourselves – the guy was incredible.
So much so, in fact, no matter the athletic pursuit, if there’s a thing that needs to wind up in another thing, you better believe somebody’s shouting “Kobe!” at the top of their lungs. You’ll hear it on playgrounds, during pick-up games and when tossing wadded-up paper into trash cans.
And you know where else you’ll hear it?
Disc golf courses.
It’s perfect for long putts.
2. ‘Butter’
Clash Discs’ food-themed branding is awful.
I love to bash on it.
But I’ve got to hand it to ‘em …
“Butter” is an epic name for a disc.
Does your cooking suck? Add a tablespoon of butter, and suddenly you’re brilliant. Is your head stuck between a pair of staircase banisters? Lube-up that melon with some butter. Could your latest putt, approach or drive use some mid-flight mumbo-jumbo? You know what to say …
“Butter.”
3. ‘Local route’
The best part of this one?
You don’t have to be good at disc golf to use it …
Any 750-rated idiot can stumble into accidental brilliance.
The “local route” declaration usually takes place after a complete and total shank-job gets skinny and winds up near the base of the pin. It’s parked, but without divine intervention, it wouldn’t be.
Say your prayers.
4. ‘Valet parking’
Speaking of being “parked,” try these on for size …
Variations of the popular description:
- “Park job.”
- “Park City.”
- “Peter Parker.”
My personal favorite, however, continues to be “valet parking.” In a literal sense, valet parking is high-class. It means you’re in a good spot. And potentially, that you’re kind of a big deal, too.
If your disc golf game is anything like mine, though, you’re not high-class, you’re rarely in a good spot and quite literally, you’re the farthest thing possible from a big deal, as well.
At least we have lip service.
5. ‘Crush money’
“Money” is nice.
“Cash money” is better.
“Crush money” is best of all.
I make that claim, because massive distance is what evokes “crush money” verbiage. For more mortal arms, these kinds of bombs are few and far between. When you drop one, let it be known.
Geronimo.
Go big or go home.
This goes for running ill-advised putts, threading tight gaps when approaching the basket and smashing unexpected drives on ball-golf holes. As an amateur, when you do something amazing, make sure all within relative earshot know of what you’ve done. You’ll feel WAY better for it …
That’s reason enough.
Have anything to add? Take to Twitter to let us know – we’ll actually (for real) get back to you.
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